random thoughts... you know how it goes.

Yesterday I read this book I got from the library; "Courting Trouble" by Deeanne Gist. (I'm a fast reader :-P ) It's about this 30-year-old woman named Essie living in Texas in the late 1800s and she's desperate for a husband. First she schemes to hitch herself up with one man, but he got married to someone else suddenly and then was smitten with a drifter cowboy who used her and then skipped town. It was a good story, and perhaps the first book I've read that ends not with her marriage (like most Christian fiction romances) but with her coming to the realization that she does not need a husband to become complete and that Christ would (and should!) become everything to her. I think I also read something similar to this a few years ago in the book "Captivating" by Staci Eldrege (I can't exactly remember though... stupid library doesn't have it.)

This is significant in that it's a realization I consciously came to maybe about a year and a half ago and I'd like to share that with you. I don't think I've ever been as desperate as Essie was to find a husband, but it's something I would like.  My second semester at school (well, at Belhaven) the RUF large group theme was about relationships.  Towards the end of the semester Chad talked about the gift of singleness, using the last half of 1 Corinthians 7. I don't think I've ever taken as many notes at RUF. I'll list some of the main points, because it'll be easier than me trying to explain my random thoughts.
* The new humanity demands we repent of our idolatry- God is concerned with the heart. Why do you want to get married? Idolatry is not cured by marriage, you will always be wanting more unless you are fulfilled by
Christ.
* Marriage is a gift, but so is singleness.  Our real wealth is in God and Christ is the only spouse that can fulfill  us. Jesus is enough! He can equip you for either calling.
* We should be pursuing people and relationships: to encourage, to learn communication, to be social, to open God's leading to wherever He calls us, to avoid idols of independence and self-fulfillment.
Coming to that realization had quite the impact on me. It felt good to be aware of the fact that I don't need to have a boyfriend or a husband, and if I never do then I know I'll be fine with that. It also helped me come to terms with some things that have happened with me and guys in the past, and that's been wonderful.  I've got Jesus and He's actually better than any other guy I know. He loves and understands me completely.

Do I feel this way all the time? No. I forget maybe a couple times a day. Do I have to frequently remind myself that I'm fine without a man? Yes. Do I always feel close to Jesus? No. Could I do better? Always. But it's comforting to know.

Oh... and in the sequel, Essie got her man. But I feel that's beside the point. ;-)

Oh... and in response to the facebook poll I conducted about 2 months ago, I think guys and girls can be good friends. As to how close emotionally you should get and the romance involved... I think that's different for everyone I guess. I'm thankful for the times I've been blessed with close friendships with guys.

Newness

Hey look, new name, new layout, new post! It's like a miracle!

Hopefully this will inspire me to blog more often and with substance. Doesn't that sound exciting?! I'm getting pretty fed up with people complaining about their lives on xanga every day. (I'm pretty sure none of my xanga friends read this... O:-) ) So anyways, that's that!